UofMUSCLE.com – M.U.S.C.L.E. Figures from Mattel

The week started strong, but really got away from me. I didn’t finish Auction Watch or my Mapman Mystery post. It’s kind of a miracle this post got put together. But this is the best kind of “crazy” time of the year. I love figuring out baseball practices, school, work, dinners, and all the chaos that surrounds the end of school and the start of summer.

215 auctions as of writing this post.
– Great listing starting at $0.99.
– “Lot consists of approximately 78 figures…” I think he meant 72.
– I wouldn’t pay $50, but I’ll be surprised if it doesn’t sell.
– At least it starts at $0.99.
– I wouldn’t pay anything for this error.
– I wouldn’t pay this much for this error.
– The opening bid or the BIN – which is more insane?
– Cool.
– Even cooler.
– I just want the puke green figure.

I was just going to call this guy a clown when I saw his listings. The shipping costs made him the Asshole of the Week. This guy came in second place. I feel like this guy has won the award before, but he deserves recognition for his ongoing AOTW week.

4,179 Buy-It-Now listings.

After the AOTW, and seeing all the BIN listings, I feel like I should share something. I started putting together my eBay listing for the Ultra Rare Red #234. I haven’t sold anything on eBay in forever. The new listing feature really helps position sellers to be assholes.

If I didn’t know anything about M.U.S.C.L.E. figures, and used eBay’s prompts, then there’s probably a 99.9% chance a seller will create a stupid opening price. It was incredibly disappointing. eBay has changed the game for the worst for M.U.S.C.L.E. collectors.

I believe that only two types of people will list M.U.S.C.L.E. auctions will sane prices: (1) people that genuinely just love M.U.S.C.L.E.; and (2) people that know low opening bids gets stuff easily out the door.

– Cool item, but the background has something cooler.
– What?!?!
– If you’ve desperate, then here’s a solution. (If it wasn’t for Professor Terry, then I may have jumped on this.)

I clicked on this because I wasn’t instantly sure what I was seeing. I never liked the Ultimate Muscle figures. But when I saw them again I had a new thought, “Have these figures poorly aged? Or is it me?”

Obviously, I’ve only gotten worse with age. But do the designs of these figures look worse years later?

I never hated the figures, but they just weren’t for me. When I looked at them again they seemed bland and lifeless. Am I alone on this?

Speaking of not liking figures, I hated the figures to the right.

I always say judgment should be reserved until you have a figure in your hand, but not this time. I hated these figures. And I hate these types of figures – lazy head swaps.

Why would anyone buy these? It’s a Star Wars head on a M.U.S.C.L.E. body. He’s not even the first person to the party.

I probably shouldn’t say any of this. I know I’ve been wrong before in a similar situation. I even liked some of his other stuff. I think the Vader Claw is a really interesting idea, and I tend to be tired of anything #153 related.

These figures are certainly art. Maybe it’s good art because it caused me such a strong reaction?

I don’t think so.

Maybe it’s not these figures alone that I dislike. Maybe it’s my guess as to why people bought these figures.

I wonder if people bought them because “they’re so bad they’re good.” I fear that people would suggest, “You don’t get the joke.”

I hope I’m wrong.

Complaining can get too easy. I should give credit to two of my absolutely favorite pictures this week. Maybe two of my favorite minifigure pictures ever. That sounds like hyperbole. I’ll say they are in my Top 25. Is that better?

Sometimes the Epilogue grinds to a screeching halt. Sometimes I feel like it has an ending. I was struggling to find an ending this week, so I was looking at some of the gifs I’ve used in the past.
Cookie Monster made me smile again. I wondered if there was anything else Cookie Monster or Muppet-related that might be funny. That’s how I found this. God bless the internet.