Epilogue – Week of August 11th

Dr. MUSCLEDr. M.U.S.C.L.E. is turning 12 years old today.

I can’t believe it.

I believe the picture to the right is the first, and youngest, picture of Dr. M.U.S.C.L.E. on the website. It could possibly be these pictures, but I’m not deep diving or stressing over it.

I can’t believe this is the last year before he’s officially a teenager. Damn it.

I don’t still see him as a baby. He’s probably, currently, locked in as a nine-year-old in my brain. That will probably change; everything does.

The change doesn’t actually bother me. Not because I’m evolved, but because I have awesome kids. Everybody says that, but from my own childhood and seeing my boys’ classmates I know that isn’t true. There are some shitty kids out there. Their awesomeness has nothing to do with me – it’s innate. I’ve taught them about baseball and Rick and Morty, but their awesomeness is internally driven.

Dr. M.U.S.C.L.E.’s intelligence and kindness is 100% him. When he was little, like in the picture, the world often confused him. I’ll never forget being at a busy play structure. Kids were running crazy up-and-down the slide. He stood there trying to understand the proper order with a confused look on his face.

Afterwards I asked if he had fun. He did, but he was still confused. He couldn’t understand why people weren’t taking turns.

Today’s he’s interested in things like Ashoka. Same awesome kid. Still wants the most people to be happy. That’s all him.

Happy birthday 12th birthday Dr. M.U.S.C.L.E.!

“Economical way to start or finish a Color Master Set…” Did that make you throw-up a little too?

Holy shit!!! A figure I would actually like to add to my collection is on eBay. Even more shocking is the starting bid isn’t $275.

I am 99.99% sure that this was the final MOTU figure from Wolf Voigt and Eric Nilla. I am also 99.999% confused why I don’t already own it. My guess is that he came out during a “dark period” of the website. I can’t imagine I would just skip it.

I would make another joke about recasting these old figures, but my last one landed with a resounding “THUD!” What can you do? Ten years of writing and some jokes aren’t going to land.

The Fisto listing might be the best thing on eBay. I can actually point to the worst too – this auction.

Expensive keshi are closer to $3~5K. These two figures are not in that expensive keshi group. Really it’s one figure. That Dr. Bombay is simply garbage.

I’m not joking when I say, “he probably took some advice from this clown.”

Of course, he just needs one person to think $9,999.99 is a great price.

So gross. So gross in every single way. It is so gross I don’t want to enter him in the AOTW tournament. It’s just too gross.

Speaking of AOTW, let’s take a look at our last winner.

Victory was achieved by a filthy figure with a $12.99 BIN. Should I be surprised that it is already relisted? No. And, of course, the price hasn’t changed.

Truly an AOTW champion.

Champions need challengers. This week provided no shortage of worthy challengers.

The AOTW #1 hurt me for two reasons. First, the seller is in Royal Oak, MI. I grew up in Royal Oak, MI. This seller is bringing shame to a lovely town. I apologize on behalf of all of Royal Oak.

What am I apologizing for? A $120 BIN for a Future Man pack.

“But we haven’t seen one in a long time!!!”

It doesn’t matter. There was a period of time where collectors couldn’t give these figures away. They were everywhere and everyone had too many. I promise you most M.U.S.C.L.E. collectors have several packs sitting in a drawer. We haven’t seen them, because nobody cares.

Having said that, I do like the extra flashing on that figure. I would have bid if it was an auction. The bids would have never gone north of $20.

I don’t always select sellers, but the AOTW #2 is clogging up my search on eBay. I am ready to ban all single figure M.U.S.C.L.E. listings. Unfortunately eBay keeps ignoring my suggestions.

The AOTW #3 confuses me. There are 12 4-packs with a $499.99 BIN. That works out to $41.67 per pack. Who is that target of this sale?

It’s not the person looking to pick-up one 4-pack. And it is certainly not the person looking to resell. Almost $42 per-pack doesn’t yield much return on that investment. I guess the target is one dummy with disposable income. Weird how that trend repeats.

Finally, we have the AOTW #4. I actually saw this last week. The seller had a $275 BIN for SC. It has come down to a $200 BIN. I’m inducting him for his $275 BIN.

Cast your vote and crown the next AOTW Fatal-Four Way winner. Here are the four combatants:


Remember to cast your vote and crown this week’s AOTW Fatal-Four Way winner:

[poll id=”84″]

There was sadness when our ULTIMATE AOTW Battle of the Champions Fatal-Four Way Winner #1 was no longer selling her empty box.

We thought this was the fine image of our old friend.

It was painful to consider our journey was over. We watched as she started at $250. Unable to sell it, dropped down to $160. The drops continued: $149, $145, $139, $135, $125 and finally $120…for a beat-up, empty box.

When she did stop, we knew there was a zero-percent chance it actually sold. It is an empty box. M.U.S.C.L.E. collectors see crazy things, but this sale was simply impossible. Plus, there is no feedback posted by either party.

We now have irrefutable evidence the box did not sell. It has been relisted with a $150 BIN. She truly is the ULTIMATE AOTW Battle of the Champions Fatal-Four Way Winner #1.

Pay attention sellers, our winners perfectly demonstrate the level-of-asshole it takes to be an ULTIMATE champion.

Our inaugural champion has a very worthy companion.

The initial listing for the $3 figure was for $1500. The entire story was covered in AW #284. Apparently, there’s still a little more to add. The figure is STILL for sale with a $100 BIN.

This seller probably could be a repeat winner with their other listings.

An original SHA, with the head spur still attached, in the original Flesh color was sold for about $185. This seller is attempting to sell a yellow, headless version for $1,000. That is the level of commitment needed to become the 2nd ULTIMATE AOTW Battle of the Champions Winner.

Sadly, it looks like our second champion has paused their grifting efforts. I do not see the figure for sale, nor do I see any feedback.

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